I still haven't heard anything from Martin so I try to goad him further. Mugu is what the scammers call their victims. It means fool. Calling them Mugu is the ultimate insult.
Dear Martin
It is too late. It is too
late
The Conquest is upon us.
High Lord Rezzillo will be
victorious
Pray for your soul mugu that he may forgive your sins
and not strike you down.
He knows what you have done.
Grey
Being
Martin
On the island of
Mugu you are the King.
King Mugu King Mugu
Prepare for
invasion.
Sadly, he doesn't bite so that is the end of a beautiful partnership. Goodbye Martin and thanks for the laughs! Time to move on and find another one :)
Wednesday, 9 October 2013
Calling occupants .............
At last, I hear back from Martin. Not quite sure what he means as his grasp of English is so terrible.
Dear Grey being
I am sorry for the delay, i went for an inspection with some company.I have not been to my office since yesterday. I will visit their office tomorrow,one thing i must bring to your notice is if you cannot send your personal cell to me as your agent,that means that i will still some filling about the issue.
Send me your personal number to enable me call you during the meeting to but few wrongs in other.
Regards,
Martin
I have begun to get bored now with Martin. I think he has sussed me so I decide to just try and wind him up by being rather silly. It's time for the invasion I think! I send him the lyrics to The Carpenters song!
In your mind you have capacities you know
To telepath messages through the vast unknown
Please close your eyes and concentrate
With every thought you think
Upon the recitation we’re about to sing
Calling occupants of interplanetary craft
Calling occupants of interplanetary most extraordinary craft
You’ve been observing our earth
And we’d like to make a contact with you
We are your friends
Calling occupants of interplanetary craft
Calling occupants of interplanetary ultra-emissaries
We’ve been observing your earth
And one night we’ll make a contact with you
We are your friends
Calling occupants of interplanetary quite extraordinary craft
And please come on peace, we beseech you
Only a landing will teach them
Our earth may never survive
So do come, we beg you
Please interstellar policeman
Oh, won’t you give us a sign
Give us a sign that we’ve reached you
With your mind you have ability to form
And transmit thought energy far beyond the norm
You close your eyes, you concentrate
Together that’s the way
To send the message
We declare world contact day
Dear Grey being
I am sorry for the delay, i went for an inspection with some company.I have not been to my office since yesterday. I will visit their office tomorrow,one thing i must bring to your notice is if you cannot send your personal cell to me as your agent,that means that i will still some filling about the issue.
Send me your personal number to enable me call you during the meeting to but few wrongs in other.
Regards,
Martin
I have begun to get bored now with Martin. I think he has sussed me so I decide to just try and wind him up by being rather silly. It's time for the invasion I think! I send him the lyrics to The Carpenters song!
In your mind you have capacities you know
To telepath messages through the vast unknown
Please close your eyes and concentrate
With every thought you think
Upon the recitation we’re about to sing
Calling occupants of interplanetary craft
Calling occupants of interplanetary most extraordinary craft
You’ve been observing our earth
And we’d like to make a contact with you
We are your friends
Calling occupants of interplanetary craft
Calling occupants of interplanetary ultra-emissaries
We’ve been observing your earth
And one night we’ll make a contact with you
We are your friends
Calling occupants of interplanetary quite extraordinary craft
And please come on peace, we beseech you
Only a landing will teach them
Our earth may never survive
So do come, we beg you
Please interstellar policeman
Oh, won’t you give us a sign
Give us a sign that we’ve reached you
With your mind you have ability to form
And transmit thought energy far beyond the norm
You close your eyes, you concentrate
Together that’s the way
To send the message
We declare world contact day
Terrible spelling for a lawyer!
As nothing has been heard from Infinity Chambers, Grey sends a quick message to Peter Mark.
Dear Peter Mark
Could you please update me as to what is happening with regard to you signing the documents on our behalf. I have been off work incapacitated after an accident but I understand our solicitors Phrodite and Eunuch sent you the necessary documents.
Please update me by close of business today.
Yours sincerely
Grey Being
And Peter replies, once again questioning my phone number and asking for a mobile number instead.
Dear Grey,
It's a pitty you had an accident and I hope you are fast recovering.
When I did not hear from you, I tried calling the provided phone numbers but a woman who picked the call never seem to know anything about you. I called several times and the same thing happened.
I reported that to your agent and the NDDC, I also told them to confirm which I am sure they did and found out the same thing.
I will need your mobile number please. I cannot be using all my time for this without hearing your voice. Money is not everything. Business is all about contunity and there is no possible chance of future relationship if we do have our contacts.
Please release your mobile number to me.
Again, I have received everything I needed from you. I also post-poned the signing date when I heard you had an accident through your solicitors.
The NDDC is waiting for us to come up for the signing. The signing date is Monday, 19th August.
We can move ahead if you so wish.
Anticipating your good cooperation and understanding.
Yours faithfully,
Peter Mark (SAN)
Principal Partner
Infinity Chambers Ltd
I ignore him!
Dear Peter Mark
Could you please update me as to what is happening with regard to you signing the documents on our behalf. I have been off work incapacitated after an accident but I understand our solicitors Phrodite and Eunuch sent you the necessary documents.
Please update me by close of business today.
Yours sincerely
Grey Being
And Peter replies, once again questioning my phone number and asking for a mobile number instead.
Dear Grey,
It's a pitty you had an accident and I hope you are fast recovering.
When I did not hear from you, I tried calling the provided phone numbers but a woman who picked the call never seem to know anything about you. I called several times and the same thing happened.
I reported that to your agent and the NDDC, I also told them to confirm which I am sure they did and found out the same thing.
I will need your mobile number please. I cannot be using all my time for this without hearing your voice. Money is not everything. Business is all about contunity and there is no possible chance of future relationship if we do have our contacts.
Please release your mobile number to me.
Again, I have received everything I needed from you. I also post-poned the signing date when I heard you had an accident through your solicitors.
The NDDC is waiting for us to come up for the signing. The signing date is Monday, 19th August.
We can move ahead if you so wish.
Anticipating your good cooperation and understanding.
Yours faithfully,
Peter Mark (SAN)
Principal Partner
Infinity Chambers Ltd
I ignore him!
Solicitors and paperwork.
In the
meantime, Herma Phrodite the lawyer is still waiting for news from
Infinity Chambers. A copy of the document had been sent to Mary Okoro at
the NDDC but again, nothing had been heard back.
Herma Phrodite contacts The NDDC
Dear Mary Okoro
Could you please confirm receipt of the paperwork sent by us on behalf of They Are Amongst Us by return mail and advise us what the next step is please?
Sincere Thanks
Herma Phrodite
Phrodite and Eunuch
Solicitors at law.
Mary Okoro replies, once again wanting a phone number.
Dear Sir,
Please release your phone number. We nee to speak with someone there.
Mrs. Mary Okoro
Secretary
So Herma Phrodite replies, complete with phone number. My heartfelt apologies to a Pizza Hut in Barnsley!
Dear Mrs Mary Okoro
Our number is as follows
01226 755 969
Please feel free to contact us at your earliest convenience. As far as I am aware, we are just awaiting Mr Peter Mark from Infinity Chambers to sign the affidavit on our behalf. If this is not done promptly we shall have to assign a new company and he will forfeit his fees in this matter.
Yours sincerely
Herma Phrodite.
Phrodite and Eunuch
Solicitors at Law.
Herma Phrodite contacts The NDDC
Dear Mary Okoro
Could you please confirm receipt of the paperwork sent by us on behalf of They Are Amongst Us by return mail and advise us what the next step is please?
Sincere Thanks
Herma Phrodite
Phrodite and Eunuch
Solicitors at law.
Mary Okoro replies, once again wanting a phone number.
Dear Sir,
Please release your phone number. We nee to speak with someone there.
Mrs. Mary Okoro
Secretary
So Herma Phrodite replies, complete with phone number. My heartfelt apologies to a Pizza Hut in Barnsley!
Dear Mrs Mary Okoro
Our number is as follows
01226 755 969
Please feel free to contact us at your earliest convenience. As far as I am aware, we are just awaiting Mr Peter Mark from Infinity Chambers to sign the affidavit on our behalf. If this is not done promptly we shall have to assign a new company and he will forfeit his fees in this matter.
Yours sincerely
Herma Phrodite.
Phrodite and Eunuch
Solicitors at Law.
A much needed catch up.
I haven't updated this blog for a few months as sometimes, life just gets in the way. I am keen to wrap it up and get started on another one. Martin did eventually suss me. I did try to do one last wind up to get him angry but he didn't bite. Shame, as scammers are very funny when they get cross! Anyway, this is the end. It will come in a few parts so enjoy and thanks 'Martin' for the laughs!
So, Grey being had had an accident. Here is his explanation for being so quiet.
From Grey Being to Martin.
Dear Martin
Firstly I must apologise for being out of contact for the last week. As Helvetica informed you, I was involved in a nasty accident last week. I was travelling back from Voniaco 5 with High Lord Rezillo when the craft was struck by lightening. Thankfully we weren't too far away from landing so I only sustained a broken leg and minor burns. High Lord Rezillo managed to vaporise at the point of contact so he was fine but left me to try and explain to the police and ambulance men what had happened and where exactly we had come from. Of course when I explained, they assumed I was drunk and insisted on doing a breath test. I rarely drink Martin as I think that alcohol is the scourge of the under classes and I am far better than that. You will be pleased to hear I am on the mend and will be back at work on Monday with the aid of crutches.
My solicitor Mrs Herma Phrodite has sent the relevant paperwork to the NDDC, Infinity Chambers and to yourself but we are yet to hear anything back. I am rather worried now. I feel things have slipped somewhat in my absence and I must insist we get things back on track as soon as possible. Martin, you and I have put so much hard work into this deal and I don't want to see it fail now. Please let me know what I need to do to get things back on track again.
We seem to be waiting for Mr Peter Mark of Infinity Chambers to sign the paperwork on our behalf. Could you contact him on our behalf please if this is not too much of an inconvenience?
I hope all is well with you Martin and would like to thank you for your patience whilst I have been incapacitated.
Regards
Grey Being.
Martin does seem to be getting suspicious about Grey.
Dear Grey Being,
I was told about the accident, i am very sorry for that, i have been praying fr you that God should give you quick recovery.
Mr Grey Being, this is to bring to your notice that i have tried my best for you, but it seems you are not reliable.
{1} The telephone number you send to me is not your own, and nobody bear your name in that company.
{2} NDDC sent a form for that required my attention, a column is been specify where i will fill mt data, but you filled it without my notice.
{3} You were asked to pay some money for the lawyer to represent you at the high court to sign some documents for you, but you did not nothing.
How many do you want me to count, if you are really what you said you are,do clarify me on the above.
Regards,
Martin
Grey is most put out by Martin's accusations and emails him back.
Dear Martin
Your mail has caused me great concern. I would like to clarify your points.
1) The telephone numbers I have given you are correct. I have no idea why you are having problems connecting with me. I have tried to call you on several occasions but every time I get through, a woman answers and says she does not know you. This has made me question whether you are who you say you are. I prefer to give you the benefit of the doubt because of all the hard work you have done on our behalf. There is a lot riding on the completion of this deal for both of us. Let's not let minor details ruin it.
2) All forms sent to me by the NDDC have been filled in correctly to the best of my knowledge. I would never knowingly fill in incorrect information or attend to something that was not my duty. If I have made a clerical error, I apologise for this. At no point have the NDDC brought any errors to my attention so once again, all I can do is apologise for this.
3) Regarding the lawyer signing documents on our behalf; I completed and sent all the relevant paperwork to Mr Peter Mark at Infinity Chambers but neither I or my solicitor Mrs Herma Phrodite have yet to hear back from them. They sent a mail detailing the payments required but never followed this through with any information as to how I was to do this. I ask you Martin, how am I supposed to arrange payment if they do not reply to either us or our solicitors?
To be honest Martin, I am beginning to wonder if this deal is actually ever going to happen. You and I have put in such a lot of hard work and effort to make this happen but now the NDDC and Infinity Chambers seem to be messing us about. Do you think I may be better off choosing another attorney? Maybe I would be better off just coming to Nigeria myself to sign the documents? What worries me is that you have worked so hard on our behalf and your payment for this is in the form of commission. If the deal isn't completed then you will lose out and not get paid. That seems extremely unfair to me Martin. Do the NDDC and Infinity Chambers not understand just how much you stand to lose if they do not make sure they do things correctly from their end?
Martin, I do not know what else to say. At all times I have been honest and trustworthy and to have my integrity brought into question has upset me greatly. I am still recovering from my accident and this has knocked me for six. I shall be returning to work tomorrow and hope that it brings better news for us.
Have faith Martin and pray that High Lord Rezillo will look favourably on us all.
Regards
Grey Being
Martin doesn't reply so I send him another quick message.
Good morning Martin
I am now back at work and wondering why I have not heard from you.
Could you please update me as to what is happening?
Regards
Grey
So, Grey being had had an accident. Here is his explanation for being so quiet.
From Grey Being to Martin.
Dear Martin
Firstly I must apologise for being out of contact for the last week. As Helvetica informed you, I was involved in a nasty accident last week. I was travelling back from Voniaco 5 with High Lord Rezillo when the craft was struck by lightening. Thankfully we weren't too far away from landing so I only sustained a broken leg and minor burns. High Lord Rezillo managed to vaporise at the point of contact so he was fine but left me to try and explain to the police and ambulance men what had happened and where exactly we had come from. Of course when I explained, they assumed I was drunk and insisted on doing a breath test. I rarely drink Martin as I think that alcohol is the scourge of the under classes and I am far better than that. You will be pleased to hear I am on the mend and will be back at work on Monday with the aid of crutches.
My solicitor Mrs Herma Phrodite has sent the relevant paperwork to the NDDC, Infinity Chambers and to yourself but we are yet to hear anything back. I am rather worried now. I feel things have slipped somewhat in my absence and I must insist we get things back on track as soon as possible. Martin, you and I have put so much hard work into this deal and I don't want to see it fail now. Please let me know what I need to do to get things back on track again.
We seem to be waiting for Mr Peter Mark of Infinity Chambers to sign the paperwork on our behalf. Could you contact him on our behalf please if this is not too much of an inconvenience?
I hope all is well with you Martin and would like to thank you for your patience whilst I have been incapacitated.
Regards
Grey Being.
Martin does seem to be getting suspicious about Grey.
Dear Grey Being,
I was told about the accident, i am very sorry for that, i have been praying fr you that God should give you quick recovery.
Mr Grey Being, this is to bring to your notice that i have tried my best for you, but it seems you are not reliable.
{1} The telephone number you send to me is not your own, and nobody bear your name in that company.
{2} NDDC sent a form for that required my attention, a column is been specify where i will fill mt data, but you filled it without my notice.
{3} You were asked to pay some money for the lawyer to represent you at the high court to sign some documents for you, but you did not nothing.
How many do you want me to count, if you are really what you said you are,do clarify me on the above.
Regards,
Martin
Grey is most put out by Martin's accusations and emails him back.
Dear Martin
Your mail has caused me great concern. I would like to clarify your points.
1) The telephone numbers I have given you are correct. I have no idea why you are having problems connecting with me. I have tried to call you on several occasions but every time I get through, a woman answers and says she does not know you. This has made me question whether you are who you say you are. I prefer to give you the benefit of the doubt because of all the hard work you have done on our behalf. There is a lot riding on the completion of this deal for both of us. Let's not let minor details ruin it.
2) All forms sent to me by the NDDC have been filled in correctly to the best of my knowledge. I would never knowingly fill in incorrect information or attend to something that was not my duty. If I have made a clerical error, I apologise for this. At no point have the NDDC brought any errors to my attention so once again, all I can do is apologise for this.
3) Regarding the lawyer signing documents on our behalf; I completed and sent all the relevant paperwork to Mr Peter Mark at Infinity Chambers but neither I or my solicitor Mrs Herma Phrodite have yet to hear back from them. They sent a mail detailing the payments required but never followed this through with any information as to how I was to do this. I ask you Martin, how am I supposed to arrange payment if they do not reply to either us or our solicitors?
To be honest Martin, I am beginning to wonder if this deal is actually ever going to happen. You and I have put in such a lot of hard work and effort to make this happen but now the NDDC and Infinity Chambers seem to be messing us about. Do you think I may be better off choosing another attorney? Maybe I would be better off just coming to Nigeria myself to sign the documents? What worries me is that you have worked so hard on our behalf and your payment for this is in the form of commission. If the deal isn't completed then you will lose out and not get paid. That seems extremely unfair to me Martin. Do the NDDC and Infinity Chambers not understand just how much you stand to lose if they do not make sure they do things correctly from their end?
Martin, I do not know what else to say. At all times I have been honest and trustworthy and to have my integrity brought into question has upset me greatly. I am still recovering from my accident and this has knocked me for six. I shall be returning to work tomorrow and hope that it brings better news for us.
Have faith Martin and pray that High Lord Rezillo will look favourably on us all.
Regards
Grey Being
Martin doesn't reply so I send him another quick message.
Good morning Martin
I am now back at work and wondering why I have not heard from you.
Could you please update me as to what is happening?
Regards
Grey
Friday, 9 August 2013
Introducing Phrodite and Eunuch Solicitors at Law.
I would like to introduce you to Mrs Herma Phrodite, principal partner in Phrodite and Eunuch, solicitors at law. She is the lucky lady drawing up the paperwork to assign power of attorney to Peter Mark, the Nigerian attorney. She contacts them and sends them the letter from They Are Amongst Us.
From Herma Phrodite to Infinity Chambers
Dear Sirs
We are Phrodite and Eunuch, the Solicitors at Law appointed by They Are Amongst Us to deal with the paperwork relating to the contract between themselves and the NDDC. Please find attached the documentation giving full power of attorney to yourselves in relation to signing affidavits and documents on their behalf. I am sure you will find this in order.
You will now be aware that Mr Grey Being was involved in an unfortunate accident and has been out of contact to yourselves. He is being released from hospital later today and I am sure he will be in touch in due course.
If there are any problems or you need any further information, do not hesitate to contact us. My name is Mrs Herma Phrodite and I am the person dealing with this matter.
Yours sincerely
Herma Phrodite
Here is the rubbish document I sent them.
And in reply.
Dear Sir/Ma,
Thank you for your information. Kindly let me have your contact phone number. Also make sure you send a copy of this mail to the tender board of the NDDC.
Regards,
Peter Mark
Principal Partner, Infinity Chambers Ltd
I send a copy to the NDDC and one to Martin.
Dear Mr Martin Eze
My name is Mrs Herma Phrodite and I am a partner in Phrodite and Eunuch, Solicitors at Law, appointed by They Are Amongst Us to deal with paperwork relating to the contract between themselves and the NDDC. Please find attached a copy of the document sent to Infinity Chambers giving them full power of attorney to deal with and sign affidavits and other documents on their behalf.
I understand buy now that you have been informed of Mr Grey Being's unfortunate accident. I am assured that he will be back at work by next week and available to be contacted at home on his usual email address by tomorrow. I am sure he will appreciate your understanding on this matter. If you have any queries please do not hesitate to contact either us or Mr Being's secretary.
Yours sincerely
Herma Phrodite
Martin replies but signs the email Mark. It must be hard remembering who you are supposed to be!
Dear Herma Phrodite,
It is very important you send this letter to NDDC lawyer as i have not power to represent them in signing any document on their behalf.
Ask Gery to provide the lawyer email address to you.
Regards,
Mark
From Herma Phrodite to Infinity Chambers
Dear Sirs
We are Phrodite and Eunuch, the Solicitors at Law appointed by They Are Amongst Us to deal with the paperwork relating to the contract between themselves and the NDDC. Please find attached the documentation giving full power of attorney to yourselves in relation to signing affidavits and documents on their behalf. I am sure you will find this in order.
You will now be aware that Mr Grey Being was involved in an unfortunate accident and has been out of contact to yourselves. He is being released from hospital later today and I am sure he will be in touch in due course.
If there are any problems or you need any further information, do not hesitate to contact us. My name is Mrs Herma Phrodite and I am the person dealing with this matter.
Yours sincerely
Herma Phrodite
Here is the rubbish document I sent them.
And in reply.
Dear Sir/Ma,
Thank you for your information. Kindly let me have your contact phone number. Also make sure you send a copy of this mail to the tender board of the NDDC.
Regards,
Peter Mark
Principal Partner, Infinity Chambers Ltd
I send a copy to the NDDC and one to Martin.
Dear Mr Martin Eze
My name is Mrs Herma Phrodite and I am a partner in Phrodite and Eunuch, Solicitors at Law, appointed by They Are Amongst Us to deal with paperwork relating to the contract between themselves and the NDDC. Please find attached a copy of the document sent to Infinity Chambers giving them full power of attorney to deal with and sign affidavits and other documents on their behalf.
I understand buy now that you have been informed of Mr Grey Being's unfortunate accident. I am assured that he will be back at work by next week and available to be contacted at home on his usual email address by tomorrow. I am sure he will appreciate your understanding on this matter. If you have any queries please do not hesitate to contact either us or Mr Being's secretary.
Yours sincerely
Herma Phrodite
Martin replies but signs the email Mark. It must be hard remembering who you are supposed to be!
Dear Herma Phrodite,
It is very important you send this letter to NDDC lawyer as i have not power to represent them in signing any document on their behalf.
Ask Gery to provide the lawyer email address to you.
Regards,
Mark
Grey Being has had an accident.
Helvetica Typeface, Grey's secretary has bad news for Martin. He's had an accident which is why he hasn't been in touch.
From Helvetica.
Dear Martin Eze
I am contacting you with regard to Mr Grey Being. Unfortunately, he was involved in a nasty accident late on Friday night. He was returning from Voniaco 5 with High Lord Rezillo when the craft was struck by lightening. He sustained a broken leg and minor burns and was kept in hospital. He is being allowed home today and will be returning to work next week. He will however keep updated from home until he returns.
He realises that this is rather inconvenient given the importance of your business dealings but has asked me to assure you that everything is in hand and you should be hearing from our lawyers shortly with the relevant paperwork.
Many thanks for your understanding on this matter.
Yours sincerely
Helvetica Typeface.
From Martin.
Dear Helvetica Typeface,
I am very sorry for this news, tell him that i will be praying for him for quick recovery. Meanwhile, i will be waiting to get good report from your lawyer.
Regards,
Martin
From Helvetica.
Dear Martin Eze
I am contacting you with regard to Mr Grey Being. Unfortunately, he was involved in a nasty accident late on Friday night. He was returning from Voniaco 5 with High Lord Rezillo when the craft was struck by lightening. He sustained a broken leg and minor burns and was kept in hospital. He is being allowed home today and will be returning to work next week. He will however keep updated from home until he returns.
He realises that this is rather inconvenient given the importance of your business dealings but has asked me to assure you that everything is in hand and you should be hearing from our lawyers shortly with the relevant paperwork.
Many thanks for your understanding on this matter.
Yours sincerely
Helvetica Typeface.
From Martin.
Dear Helvetica Typeface,
I am very sorry for this news, tell him that i will be praying for him for quick recovery. Meanwhile, i will be waiting to get good report from your lawyer.
Regards,
Martin
Blah blah blah!!! Sometimes Martin is such a pest!
Martin! If a day goes by without me contacting him, he starts sending me lots of messages. I do like to keep him hanging on so deiced to just ignore him for a while. I do feel sorry for the people at Barnsley College who keep getting phone calls from a Nigerian Man asking for Grey Being!
From Martin.
Dear Grey,
I will be expecting good news from you.
Regards,
Martin
From me.
Dear Martin
I am awaiting our lawyers preparing the necessary documentation to send to enable Mr Peter Mark to act as power of attorney and sign the necessary documents on our behalf.
I realise this whole process is taking sometime but it is out of my hands I am afraid. Hopefully this way we will ensure that everything goes smoothly and there are no hitches in the process.
I shall contact you asap once I hear back from my lawyers. And remember, patience is a virtue Martin!
Regards
Grey.
From Martin.
Dear Grey Being,
Yes i do understand, Government have their way of doing things.Nothing good comes easy. The whole issue must pass through due process.
I do understand that it need patience.
God will help us.
Regards,
Martin
And another.
Dear Grey Being,
I have been calling the number you send to me, and a lady kept telling me that he do not know the person i am talking about.
Send me your personal cell phone so that i will call you.
Again, have you hear from their lawyer. Update me.
Regards,
Martin
And another.
Dear Grey Being,
Today is a new day and a new week. It is very important we conclude this transaction this week.Update me.
Regards,
Martin
And yet another!
Dear Grey Being,
I am confused, what is happening?
Update me.
Regards,
Martin
And one last one.
Dear Grey Being,
Any problem? Update me Please.
Martin
From Martin.
Dear Grey,
I will be expecting good news from you.
Regards,
Martin
From me.
Dear Martin
I am awaiting our lawyers preparing the necessary documentation to send to enable Mr Peter Mark to act as power of attorney and sign the necessary documents on our behalf.
I realise this whole process is taking sometime but it is out of my hands I am afraid. Hopefully this way we will ensure that everything goes smoothly and there are no hitches in the process.
I shall contact you asap once I hear back from my lawyers. And remember, patience is a virtue Martin!
Regards
Grey.
From Martin.
Dear Grey Being,
Yes i do understand, Government have their way of doing things.Nothing good comes easy. The whole issue must pass through due process.
I do understand that it need patience.
God will help us.
Regards,
Martin
And another.
Dear Grey Being,
I have been calling the number you send to me, and a lady kept telling me that he do not know the person i am talking about.
Send me your personal cell phone so that i will call you.
Again, have you hear from their lawyer. Update me.
Regards,
Martin
And another.
Dear Grey Being,
Today is a new day and a new week. It is very important we conclude this transaction this week.Update me.
Regards,
Martin
And yet another!
Dear Grey Being,
I am confused, what is happening?
Update me.
Regards,
Martin
And one last one.
Dear Grey Being,
Any problem? Update me Please.
Martin
Patience is a virtue Martin!
I let Martin know that I have contacted Infinity Chambers, not that he doesn't already know. He constantly pushes for updates. I choose to be sketchy and make him wait.
From me.
Good morning Martin
I have contacted the NDDC requesting a Nigerian Attorney at Law to sign the contract on my behalf as I am unable to travel to Nigeria at this present moment.
I shall update you as soon as I hear back from them.
Many thanks
Grey.
From Martin.
Dear Grey Being,
I am grateful for your effort. As soon as they get any lawyer for you, do update me so that i will visit the person.
God bless you.
Regards,
Martin
Another from Martin.
Dear Grey Being,
How are you today with your workforce?hope all is well.
Did you contacted them for the lawyer issue.Update me.
Regards,
Martin
And from me.
Dear Martin
I have emailed the relevant departments re the signing of the contract and I await their response. I shall of course inform you as soon as I hear anything.
Regards
Grey
From Martin.
Dear Grey Being,
I am very grateful, do carry me along for more update.
God bless you,
Regards,
Martin
From me.
Martin
I will update you as soon as I hear anything, Please bear with me.
Regards
Grey.
And another from Martin.
Dear Grey Being,
Okay, i will be waiting.
Regards,
Martin
From me.
Good morning Martin
I have contacted the NDDC requesting a Nigerian Attorney at Law to sign the contract on my behalf as I am unable to travel to Nigeria at this present moment.
I shall update you as soon as I hear back from them.
Many thanks
Grey.
From Martin.
Dear Grey Being,
I am grateful for your effort. As soon as they get any lawyer for you, do update me so that i will visit the person.
God bless you.
Regards,
Martin
Another from Martin.
Dear Grey Being,
How are you today with your workforce?hope all is well.
Did you contacted them for the lawyer issue.Update me.
Regards,
Martin
And from me.
Dear Martin
I have emailed the relevant departments re the signing of the contract and I await their response. I shall of course inform you as soon as I hear anything.
Regards
Grey
From Martin.
Dear Grey Being,
I am very grateful, do carry me along for more update.
God bless you,
Regards,
Martin
From me.
Martin
I will update you as soon as I hear anything, Please bear with me.
Regards
Grey.
And another from Martin.
Dear Grey Being,
Okay, i will be waiting.
Regards,
Martin
Introducing Mr Peter Mark and Infinity Chambers.
So, I have decided that I cannot travel to Nigeria to sign the documents and Mary Okoro of The NDDC wants me to contact Infinity Chambers so they can assign me a lawyer. On putting 'Infinity Chambers' into Google, the first result is an anti-scam website so if any of you were in any doubt that this was a scam, there is more proof.
From Mary Okoro of The NDDC
Dear Sir,
Thank you for your mail. The man who is presently in Asia demands for your mobil number as he wants to speak with you.
Regarding the lawyer's contact, they have said I should send the following details to you:
Mr. Mark Peter (SAN)
Senior Partner
Infinity Chambers Ltd
26 New World Rd, Lagos Nigeria
Email: info@infinitychambersltd.com
Please kindly contact him and find out his itenary. Do contact him immediately and ask him his charges. Possibly mobilise him with payment to enable him commence the procedures.
Regards,
Mrs. Mary Okoro
Secretary
So, I contact Infinity Chambers.
Dear Sir
I have been asked to contact you about signing the contract between ourselves - They Are Amongst Us and The NDDC for the tender to supply good for their project.
I would be grateful if you could send me details of your fees and availability by return mail.
Yours sincerely
Grey Being
And Peter Mark replies.
Dear Sir/Madam,
LETTER OF INTRODUCTION
Thank you for your mail. I am a Solicitors and Advocate residents in Lagos, Nigeria. I have been briefed on the urgency your company require in signing some Contract documents at the Ministry Of Justice head quarter in Abuja.
It is my pleasure to inform you that the above assignment is within my scope and it is usually based on local remunerations. To carry out this assignment satisfactorily, I have to go to the High Court to swear the necessary affidavits that will empower me to be your legal representative in signing the documents. Again, I need a power of Attorney duly written and signed in your company headed paper authorizing me to sign all documents relating to your contract.
At the High Court where the necessary affidavits will be sworn, the following fees will be paid before authenticating the Affidavits:
Oath Fee = US$ 700.00
Stamp Duty = US$1400.00
Legalization = US$850.00
Above all, our professional fee to carry out this noble assignment for you is the sum of US$600.00.
Total fees required =US$3600.00.(or the equivalent in GBP).
On hearing from you, we shall commence preliminary arrangement prior to the signing of the documents.
I assure you of a maximum satisfaction of my professional services which include making sure that the terms of the agreement are fulfilled and on time.
Anticipating your good cooperation and understanding.
Yours faithfully,
Peter Mark (SAN)
Principal Partner
Infinity Chambers Ltd
From Mary Okoro of The NDDC
Dear Sir,
Thank you for your mail. The man who is presently in Asia demands for your mobil number as he wants to speak with you.
Regarding the lawyer's contact, they have said I should send the following details to you:
Mr. Mark Peter (SAN)
Senior Partner
Infinity Chambers Ltd
26 New World Rd, Lagos Nigeria
Email: info@infinitychambersltd.com
Please kindly contact him and find out his itenary. Do contact him immediately and ask him his charges. Possibly mobilise him with payment to enable him commence the procedures.
Regards,
Mrs. Mary Okoro
Secretary
So, I contact Infinity Chambers.
Dear Sir
I have been asked to contact you about signing the contract between ourselves - They Are Amongst Us and The NDDC for the tender to supply good for their project.
I would be grateful if you could send me details of your fees and availability by return mail.
Yours sincerely
Grey Being
And Peter Mark replies.
Dear Sir/Madam,
LETTER OF INTRODUCTION
Thank you for your mail. I am a Solicitors and Advocate residents in Lagos, Nigeria. I have been briefed on the urgency your company require in signing some Contract documents at the Ministry Of Justice head quarter in Abuja.
It is my pleasure to inform you that the above assignment is within my scope and it is usually based on local remunerations. To carry out this assignment satisfactorily, I have to go to the High Court to swear the necessary affidavits that will empower me to be your legal representative in signing the documents. Again, I need a power of Attorney duly written and signed in your company headed paper authorizing me to sign all documents relating to your contract.
At the High Court where the necessary affidavits will be sworn, the following fees will be paid before authenticating the Affidavits:
Oath Fee = US$ 700.00
Stamp Duty = US$1400.00
Legalization = US$850.00
Above all, our professional fee to carry out this noble assignment for you is the sum of US$600.00.
Total fees required =US$3600.00.(or the equivalent in GBP).
On hearing from you, we shall commence preliminary arrangement prior to the signing of the documents.
I assure you of a maximum satisfaction of my professional services which include making sure that the terms of the agreement are fulfilled and on time.
Anticipating your good cooperation and understanding.
Yours faithfully,
Peter Mark (SAN)
Principal Partner
Infinity Chambers Ltd
Thursday, 8 August 2013
More documents and a Nigerian lawyer.
With various contracts and documents received from The NDDC, emails come back and forth between us all. Mary Okoro sent me yet another document for me to check and send back.
Dear Sir,
This is the draft copy of the contract agreement made between your company and this organisation. This draft contract is subject to errors of different kinds. kindly and carefully go through the attached draft agreement and raise objection against any section of it that is not suitable to your company for immediate consideration for amendments.
Please reply as soon as possible with your comments, otherwise we will assume you have accepted all the terms. You should confirm this mail immediately by a return mail.
Mrs. Mary Okoro
Board Secretary
www.nddc.gov.ng
Info@nddc.gov.ng
+2348191941731, +2348029954970
And here is the document. Note the terrible handwriting obviously done in a paint programme!
I duly reply.
Dear Mrs Mary Okoro
This mail is to confirm receipt of the draft contract. Our lawyers have checked and agreed this is suitable. There are no immediate amendments or errors. We therefore accept all terms and wish to proceed with the tender contract.
Yours sincerely
Grey Being
Mary now wants to know which option I choose, coming to Nigeria and signing the documents myself or assigning a Nigerian Lawyer to do it for me.
Dear Sir,
We are sending this attached letter for the signing of the original contract between your company and the NDDC. Kindly do go through the letter and let us know which option.
Your urgent reply and phone call to this important message will be highly appreciated.
Mrs. Mary Okoro
Board Secretary
www.nddc.gov.ng
Info@nddc.gov.ng
+2348191941731, +2348029954970
Obviously I choose a Nigerian lawyer.
Dear Mary Okoro
I have checked the document with my lawyer and wish to assign a Nigerian Attorney at Law to sign the contract on my behalf as it is not possible for me to travel to Nigeria at this moment in time.
Please inform me of the name of said person and their relevant qualifications etc.
I look forward to your response on this matter.
Yours sincerely
Grey Being
They Are Amongst Us
Dear Sir,
This is the draft copy of the contract agreement made between your company and this organisation. This draft contract is subject to errors of different kinds. kindly and carefully go through the attached draft agreement and raise objection against any section of it that is not suitable to your company for immediate consideration for amendments.
Please reply as soon as possible with your comments, otherwise we will assume you have accepted all the terms. You should confirm this mail immediately by a return mail.
Mrs. Mary Okoro
Board Secretary
www.nddc.gov.ng
Info@nddc.gov.ng
+2348191941731, +2348029954970
And here is the document. Note the terrible handwriting obviously done in a paint programme!
I duly reply.
Dear Mrs Mary Okoro
This mail is to confirm receipt of the draft contract. Our lawyers have checked and agreed this is suitable. There are no immediate amendments or errors. We therefore accept all terms and wish to proceed with the tender contract.
Yours sincerely
Grey Being
Mary now wants to know which option I choose, coming to Nigeria and signing the documents myself or assigning a Nigerian Lawyer to do it for me.
Dear Sir,
We are sending this attached letter for the signing of the original contract between your company and the NDDC. Kindly do go through the letter and let us know which option.
Your urgent reply and phone call to this important message will be highly appreciated.
Mrs. Mary Okoro
Board Secretary
www.nddc.gov.ng
Info@nddc.gov.ng
+2348191941731, +2348029954970
Obviously I choose a Nigerian lawyer.
Dear Mary Okoro
I have checked the document with my lawyer and wish to assign a Nigerian Attorney at Law to sign the contract on my behalf as it is not possible for me to travel to Nigeria at this moment in time.
Please inform me of the name of said person and their relevant qualifications etc.
I look forward to your response on this matter.
Yours sincerely
Grey Being
They Are Amongst Us
Necessary but a bit boring update.
I haven't updated this blog for a while and so much has happened. The last update saw the NDDC send me the four documents, awarding me the contract. Now Martin got all rashy, pestering me to update him and generally being bossy about what I should do next. I do love to ignore him!!!
From Martin
Dear Grey Being,,
I am very happy to hear from you confirming that you received the award documents. That is to show you my sincerity and seriousness.
I am very happy. Please do contact them and demand the next step and update me.
Regards,
Martin
And again.....
Dear Grey Being,
Information reaching me from the office of the NDDC states that they have sent a draft contract to you. Please this is to show that God is on our side.
It is very important you contact them as soon as possible to avoid delay. Do this and update me.
Regards,
Martin
And again .......
Dear Grey Being,
I hope that you are not out of your office.. Please do confirm to me as i was told that you have receive a draft contract, this is not the time to delay, we need to work hand in hand.
Do get back to me.
Regards,
Martin
I finally decide to reply.
Good afternoon Martin
I must send my most sincere apologies for the delay in contacting you. I sent the draft contract away for our lawyers to check over and there are no issues with it at all you will be pleased to hear. Unfortunately, we had a major crash of our entire computer network which brought utter chaos to the company. We got the very best technical staff in to remedy the problem and they have worked tirelessly for the last 24 hours to fix the situation. It turns out, one of the cleaners had unplugged the main network server to plug her hoover in and forgot to plug it back in again afterwards! Hasten to add, she has now been dismissed.
So Martin, everything seems above board and complete with the draft contract. I shall contact the NDDC forthwith and apologise for the delay. I shall of course update you as soon as I hear anything in response.
May the High Lord Rezillo look favourably on us all.
Regards
Grey.
And from Martin.
Dear Grey Being,
Thanks for your kind update. Please it is very important you ask your lawyer to sign the contract and return to them. Please this will enable me give them close marking as we are getting closer to finalize the contract.
So contact them and do update me.
Regards,
Martin
From Martin
Dear Grey Being,,
I am very happy to hear from you confirming that you received the award documents. That is to show you my sincerity and seriousness.
I am very happy. Please do contact them and demand the next step and update me.
Regards,
Martin
And again.....
Dear Grey Being,
Information reaching me from the office of the NDDC states that they have sent a draft contract to you. Please this is to show that God is on our side.
It is very important you contact them as soon as possible to avoid delay. Do this and update me.
Regards,
Martin
And again .......
Dear Grey Being,
I hope that you are not out of your office.. Please do confirm to me as i was told that you have receive a draft contract, this is not the time to delay, we need to work hand in hand.
Do get back to me.
Regards,
Martin
I finally decide to reply.
Good afternoon Martin
I must send my most sincere apologies for the delay in contacting you. I sent the draft contract away for our lawyers to check over and there are no issues with it at all you will be pleased to hear. Unfortunately, we had a major crash of our entire computer network which brought utter chaos to the company. We got the very best technical staff in to remedy the problem and they have worked tirelessly for the last 24 hours to fix the situation. It turns out, one of the cleaners had unplugged the main network server to plug her hoover in and forgot to plug it back in again afterwards! Hasten to add, she has now been dismissed.
So Martin, everything seems above board and complete with the draft contract. I shall contact the NDDC forthwith and apologise for the delay. I shall of course update you as soon as I hear anything in response.
May the High Lord Rezillo look favourably on us all.
Regards
Grey.
And from Martin.
Dear Grey Being,
Thanks for your kind update. Please it is very important you ask your lawyer to sign the contract and return to them. Please this will enable me give them close marking as we are getting closer to finalize the contract.
So contact them and do update me.
Regards,
Martin
Monday, 29 July 2013
In a jam.
So the NDDC awarded me the tender and I replied as requested. I hadn't told Martin I had heard from the NDDC so sent him a message asking if he had heard anything from them. He emailed a few times over the weekend but of course I ignored them as I don't work weekends!! I put him out of his misery this morning!
My reply to the NDDC
A message from me to Martin
And from Martin to Me
Another couple from Martin
Good morning Martin!
Grey
My reply to the NDDC
Dear Mrs Mary Okoro.
Many thanks to the NDDC for awarding me the contract to
supply my goods for your project. I am acknowledging receipt of the documents
and wish to know how we proceed to the next stage.
May I take a moment to thank you for choosing my company. We
only produce the highest quality goods and can assure you that you won't be
disappointed with the outcome.
Yours sincerely
Grey Being.
A message from me to Martin
Good afternoon Martin
I hope you are well this afternoon.
Since submitting my completed Form A2 the the NDDC, I have
yet to receive a reply. I was wondering if you had heard anything from them
yet? Did you say you were going to meet with them once you had a copy of my
completed form? If you check your emails, I did send it to you.
I don't wish to be impatient but time is money Martin and
big business waits for no-one.
I look forward to hearing from you as soon as possible on
this matter.
Regards
Grey.
And from Martin to Me
Dear Grey,
Just coming back from their office, a lot of things are
going on, they have started awarding contract to companies that passed their
pass mark. I spoke with their secretary,here in Nigeria
nothing goes for nothing i tried my best. So she assured me that your name will
be among those that will receive contract letter either today or. tomorrow.
So all we need now is favor and prayer. Do update me if you
hear from them.
Regards,
Martin
Another couple from Martin
Dear Grey Being,
Information reaching now says that they have send the
contract award documents to you. Please confirm to me please.
Regards,
Martin Eze
Dear Grey Being,
Have you receive the award letter or contract from
them?Update me please.
Regards,
Martin
Finally I reply!
Good morning Martin!
And what a wonderful morning it is too! On arriving at the
office this morning (rather late as I got stuck in traffic behind a lorry
carrying strawberries and pectin that had broken down and caused a massive
jam.) I checked my emails to find that the NDDC have awarded me the contract!!
I received 4 pieces of documentation relating to the award from the NDDC that
confirm they wish me to supply the goods for their project.
So Martin, where do we go from here? I have already hired
extra staff to help complete the order as it's by far the largest we have ever
won. They will be working overtime to complete the order. This is the first
time my company has undertaken such a contract and it is rather different from our usual ones. We usually just supply
individuals and small companies so this is a wonderful opportunity for us to
get our products out there in the wider world.
I really must take this opportunity to thank you for acting
on our behalf as agent. You have brought an amazing opportunity to our company
and I will be forever grateful to you. High Lord Rezillo has marked a special
role for you once the conquest is complete.
Fond regards
Grey
I won!! I won!!! I won the tender! Now there's a surprise.
What a surprise! The NDDC have awarded me the tender to supply my products for their project. What on earth they will do with sveral thousand Primark bracelets and glass pepper grinders is anyone's guess!! I received an email from Mrs Mary Okoro with four documents attached. The'documents' are never proper documents, just jpeg images! Anyway, it's mine, all mine!!! £920, 000 contract!!
Attention: The President.
Sir/Madam,
We have awarded the contract to your company after
considering so many factors. Kindly go through the contract award confirmation documents
attached and get back to us with a return mail a compulsory call to the Head,
procurement Unit with the number +2348029954970.
Accept our heart felt congratulations.
Mrs. Mary Okoro
Board Secretary
www.nddc.gov.ng
Info@nddc.gov.ng
+2348191941731, +2348029954970
Boring but necessary.
So, where are we up to? Quite a bit to update from over the last few days. I was sent and duly returned the Form A2 to the NDDC and sent a copy to Martin to look at. I hadn't heard anything so thought it wouldn't hurt to send them a message. All a bit boring but necessary for the bigger picture.
From me to the NDDC
From the NDDC
From me to the NDDC
Dear Mrs Mary Okoro
I was wondering if you had discussed my tender with the
board yet? I don't mean to be impatient
but I have High Lord Rezillo breathing down my neck wanting to know what is
happening.
I look forward to your response.
Grey Being
They Are Amongst Us
From the NDDC
Dear Sir,
The final decision will be made before the end of the week.
Our news shall reach you soon.
Mrs Mary Okoro
Secretary
And from me
Dear Mary Okoro
Many thanks for your kind response and I look forward to
hearing from you in due course.
Regards
Grey Being
Wednesday, 24 July 2013
More emails blah blah blah! Wish he woud hurry up and ask me for some money!
Here are a few more rather boring emails between the two of us. I just wish he would hurry up and ask for his fee money back!
Dear Grey Being,
I just received a call from one of my agent friend that a
form has been distributed to all tender bidders, do notify me if you have
receive the form.
Regards,
Martin
And from me:
Martin
As stated in my previous email, I received, completed and
returned the from. I will keep you informed as soon as I hear anything by
return.
Regards
Grey
And from him:
Dear Grey Being,
I am happy to hear from that you have received a copy of the
form and have filled it and returned to them. I am happy,do send a copy of the
form for my perusal and do update me more.
Regards,
Martin
And again:
Dear Grey Being,
Send a copy of the form to me please.
Regards,
Martin
So I oblige and send him a copy (not that he hasn't already seen it of course!)
Dear Martin
Please find attached a copy of the Form A2 that I completed.
I have not had any response from the NDDC as of yet but will
of course update you as soon as I do hear anything.
Regards
Grey
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)