A.S.I.F - A reply to Martin.

After a few busy days, I finally had time to be able to reply to Martin. He hasn't actually asked me what line of busines I am in yet so I thought I had better tell him. My business was started after a visit from high Lord Rezillo, a hat tip to Alistair Donaldson aka William Mysterious, bass player with The Rezillos who died this week. Let's see if Martin has any idea what A.S.I.F means!!





Dear Martin (I hope it's ok to call you Martin?)

I am now back at work after a few days away at a business conference so thank you for your patience. This conference was an excellent opportunity for my company to get it's name more widely known so it was extremely important for me to attend.

I suppose I really should tell you a bit more about my company if you are still interested in doing business with us. I feel it is imperative that as potential business partners, we are upfront and honest right from the word go. At 'They Are Amongst Us', we specialise in products aimed at the A.S.I.F (Arbitrary Salutation Intergalactic Furtherance) market. Whilst we realise that this is quite a niche market, we have a healthy and increasing annual turnover of in excess of £25m per annum. I am sure you will agree that this is a pretty good turnover for a compay that I started from my own garden shed back in 2000! From a lone venture, started by me after a nocturnal visitation by the High Lord Rezillo one sunday evening in December 1999 to a multi million pound company in just 13 years, I don't think I have done too badly! I now employ 2000 staff over 4 sites and am the worlds largest and most successfull A.S.I.F manufacturer.

We are in the process of doing a major reconstruction and overhaul of our company website so will send you a link in a few days when the work is complete.

Martin, would you like to tell me a little more about yourself and your role as government accredited commission agent for the Niger Delta Development Commission please? I like to get to know a person before I consider entering into business with them. Does the Niger Delta Development Commission have a website or some more information that I could look at please? I also like to know people on a more personal level so could you please answer the following questions please:

What is your favourite time of year?
Who is your hero?
What size shoe do you take?
When did you last cry at a movie and which one was it?
Have you ever eaten Kentucky Fried Chicken?

Please feel free to ask questions of myself as I like to  think I am a very honest and open person.

I look forward very much to recieving your reply and hope we can get this potential deal moving.

Yours sincerely

Grey.